Anna Be.

Image by bklyn down via Flickr Markedly less depressive now that I was a few days ago! Man, I just have to keep control on my schedule and stop using caffeine in place of sleep. Insomnia has always triggered the crazies for me.

Image via Wikipedia I've not treated myself so well these last few days, not sleeping enough, living on junk and caffeine and anxiety. It's an awful cycle to get jacked up on junk, not be able to sleep, need more caffeine to function, never sleep, take pills to sleep, get more tired but too anxious and still awake. So these last few nights when I was finally too tired to brain my school work, but too tired to sleep, I've been caught in this nasty loop of contemplating my infertility. THUD I guess it flared up a few days ago when I heard some asinine comment about gay people not having valid marriages because they can't reproduce. I take that personally because, obviously, the same logic invalidates my marriage, right? I don't think it's too uncommon for women with infertility to get their self-worth all wrapped up in not being able to perform this very very basic biological function. Then you can throw God in the mix, and forget about it. God clearly felt ...

Image by ¡Viva la Cynthia! via Flickr A bit of background: this summer I started my first semester toward a master's in library information science from the University of North Texas . The two classes I'm taking -- Intro to Information Professions and Intro to Information Organization -- start with several days of lecture, and the rest of the semester is totally online. So I left for Denton (near Dallas) last Wednesday. I really had no idea what to expect, but I took a stack of magazines and books a foot high because I'd be reading a lot, right? Nope, didn't crack a single one. For five days, I was in lectures from 8 to 5. Then I was back at Image via Wikipedia the hotel trying to grasp the Everest of assignments I'm expected to do in the next month and a half. It was like we were all dumped at the start line of a marathon, expected to sprint to the end and then, btw, you can train for all this after we're done. I spent first 10 miles going, omgwtf????...

Image via Wikipedia two upcoming themes for Somerset Studios: aubergine and Alice in Wonderland.

Image via Wikipedia I am so addicted to food, I am panicking at the thought of not eating anything but fruit today! So far I've had juice, cherries, cantaloupe and apricots. It's making me grouchy, but I haven't cracked yet. Still, I'm wishing Nick would not be supportive of this challenge and would instead take me out for a steak and fries. mmm.

Image by Carol Moshier via Flickr After two hell weeks at work and lots of junky food during the off hours, it's time to clean up my act. I thought it would be a good idea to start the summer with a 9-day detox. It starts tomorrow with all fruit for a day, then all fruits and vegetables for a day. Then the next seven days, only fruits, vegetables, whole grains, seeds, nuts and fish. Also, exercise and yoga everyday, plus some hydrotherapy and massage. I'll try to write about it the whole way through to keep on track. Also, we are starting tonight and watching all of Lost straight through from the beginning.

Image via Wikipedia Right now, Nick is 30 minutes into an all-day test, a major career-defining moment (no pressure, babe.) This stinking test, which is the brass ring at the near-end of a 6-year carousel ride, has eclipsed everything for months. When he doesn't have to study for hours a day, I might get to see what my husband's hobbies are. That's why after it's over today, we are going to Austin to celebrate for a few days (celebrate the test being over and Nick's 32nd birthday.) But now, I have to get ready for work.