I'm working my program at Weight Watchers, as you may know. I say "working my program" because that's the way they say it at Alcoholics Anonymous and other addiction programs. I've never been to AA, but I know enough from pop culture to see the similarities. We show up for our meetings every week (more often if you're really struggling), tell our personal tales, get stickers and trinkets for passing milestones. I'm ok with the analogy.
So I'm working my program, tracking everything, using the motivational tools. But I have a dirty little secret. My secret is the junk I eat on the way home from work when I'm stressed or upset.
You can find the evidence of my secret in my car. The garbage in my car at the end of the week tells the complete story of how bad my mood has been. This week you would find a KING SIZE Reese's wrapper and a bag from Sonic (with clearly visible tater tot residue).
When I stopped at the grocery store Tuesday, the thought of an illicit REGULAR-SIZED Reese's was just not enough. I had to have the double shot, please, and I ate it before I was even out of the parking lot. The tots-urge hit me today. I actually have oven tots at home, but my mood wouldn't tolerate the delay.
According to my program I should take this time to examine what is behind the transgressions and implement new coping mechanisms. The truth is I don't understand the connection between a monumentally shitty day (year) at work and craving junk food. I just wanted to start by making my confession and exposing my hiding place. If you're ever in my car, please insist on examining my garbage.